You know what "ghosting" is? It happened to me a couple times, and at least once, it ended up making me look like a creeper! And that's why ghosters get the Rabe Shot!

A new survey found the most annoying dating habits. Social media stalking came in second. First was ghosting. And the second I saw that, my mind raced back to the first time it happened to me.

What is ghosting? Ghostface Illa has the top definition on  According to Mr Illa...

I don't remember the year, but I think I met her at one of my bar gigs. We lived across the street from each other, and really had a lot of fun together...until I chaperoned a week long trip to a Key Club International Convention. Before I left, everything was good. A nice smoochy goodbye, enjoy your trip, don't punch Mickey Mouse in the ear-hole, etc. You know, the usj.

It was pre-cell phones, so when I got to the hotel, I called and left a message. She was a real estate agent, and kept odd hours, so I was't surprised when she didn't call back right away. Or in two days. Then it turned into 4 days. Then, a week later, she still hadn't called (even tho I was back in town). One afternoon I was taking out the garbage, and I saw her car pull in.


Aly Tyler - Placed here because I like puppies.

I called her place. No answer. I called back, thinking I'd dialed wrong. Still no answer. Over the next week I called a few more times, left a message on her door, and finally came home to a note on my door telling me to stop stalking her. "How dense do you have to be to not know I've dumped you?!" Boy, that hit me hard. Really. I had ZERO idea.

I was seriously lacking dating experience, so of course I had to respond. The note I left on her door said,

"Ethel...this was my fault, and I apologize completely. I was absent the day you broke up with me, and didn't line up someone to take notes."

What surprised me is that it hurt. It hurt to be dumped without being part of the conversation. Not that I'd have tried to change her mind...people get to be themselves and do what they need to do, you know? It made me seriously wonder if I was a bad guy and she HAD to ghost outta there. I had no reason to believe it, but when you start looking everywhere for answers, you uncover some unusual stuff.

A couple years later she emailed and explained it all. She'd met another guy and didn't want to hurt my feelings.



Anyway, if you're a ghoster...please, stop it. That's a real person you're disappearing on. For the love of all that's holy, a text. Muster a text.

This doesn't apply if you're in an unhealthy relationship. If you need to get out, do whatever it takes to be safe and be you.