The First Little Piggy Went to Market – A Sad Analysis

Everyone knows the toe-game y'play with babies...but do you know the sinister truth of the game? It will shock you!

This little piggy went to market,
This little piggy stayed home,
This little piggy had roast beef,
This little piggy had none,
And this little piggy went wee wee wee all the way home.

According to this, it's really really old!

In 1728, the first line of the rhyme appeared in a medley called "The Nurse's Song". The first known full version was recorded in The Famous Tommy Thumb's Little Story-Book, published in London about 1760.

Back then, no one would have been shocked by what I have to tell you. Today, tho, no one thinks about what the first little piggy was really doing.

"This little piggy when to market." It sounds nice, doesn't it? I picture a pig with dungarees and a straw hat, pulling a wagon as she selects the ripest tomatoes, the perfect pair of pants for Hoggy jr, and flowers for that night's dinner-trough.

The reality, is not so quaint. The "market" is not a Hy-Vee kinda situation. Nope. More like a place where pigs go to be sold...for eatin' and whatnot. That's right. Baby's big toe? It's headin' for slaughter.

OK, so, now that you know that, let's think about the next piggy. The little piggy that stayed home. Could that piggy have stayed home to mourn the loss of  Big Toe? And why was a piggie eating roast beef? Was it in sammich form, with just a touch of horseradish? And how did piggy hold the sandwich?

And what about the last piggy? Did she cry like a pig, or was she French and mistranslated? Maybe she was saying, "Oui oui oui!" as she ran from the butcher, running to her REAL home, not the farm.

There are just too many unanswered questions, so we have to ask ourselves...who benefits? ((cue ominous conspiracy music))

While you're thinking about it...enjoy "Promnight in Pigtown" by John Gorka, My favorite part?

And some stayed up all night,
To greet the morning light,
And some went to the shore.
And after that the class would scatter,
From Delaware to deli platter,