It happens to me all the time. I board a plane, and wham! Bam! Slam! Dough-heads, living in an alternate world where they're actions affect no one, are knockin' me and everyone else around. It happens at every airport and on almost all planes. So let's practice Rochester International Airport

Last weekend I flew to Detroit, and, thankfully, I was flying with mostly commuters, so they're on planes all the time and know the rules, so I was not attacked by relentless and selfish dough-heads.

So, I offer up some basic rules for flying. No matter how old you are, these rules apply to you.

a) Do you have a backpack on when you walk into #RST? Cool. No worries. Just be aware you are taking up the space of two people. You plus one space behind you. If you spin around to look at something, two people are spinning around to look at something. If you stop to check a text, two people are stopping to check a text.

ii) So, be aware of your surroundings. Backpacks rule, but they also hit people. If no one is near you, swing, stop, sway, dance, vomit, whatever. You're good. If there are people around you, pretend you're a car and move to the side to slow down or stop. Then, when re-entering the slow, merge like you would on a high-way.

3) Boarding the plane? You can keep your backpack on until you're right about to board. But, just before you walk thru the plane door, take it off (look around, take it off without hitting anyone) and hold it in front of you. This way you won't hit anyone with it. And trust me, you do or you will. It's the law of backpacks.

inside airplane

D) Know where you're going and where you're going to put the backpack. If it's above, but there are things you'll need at your seat, get it out in the waiting area. Spot an open bin? Swing 'er up, put 'er in, and get to your seat. It's a backpack, not a last kiss, no need to linger. Swing, stow, move. This space may be well before your seat.  That's OK.

If you're going to keep the backpack at your seat, swing it up and onto your seat, move out of the aisle, and store it when you sit down. Do not stand in the aisle, stowing your pack and then sitting down. Is it as convenient? No...but we're all on the same team here, the sooner you're out of the way, the sooner the plane fills up and we can go.

See? it's mostly about being aware of your surroundings. I call it being present in your life, and being aware how you're actions affect others. Otherwise, you're a selfish jerk-face-crap-head. And no one wants to be a JFCH!

It's National Donut Day, so I went back to October to remember my first Peanut Butter Cup Donut!  ((harp sounds)) Let's go back...

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